The saying “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter,” implies that aging is more about attitude than actual years. As men grow older, they often gain wisdom and confidence, becoming more assertive.
But what changes occur over time?
Which traits do men develop that boost their self-assurance?
Let’s explore these traits and consider expert insights.
As we examine these qualities, we may find inspiration to adopt some or all of them to enhance our own confidence and assertiveness.
With that in mind, here are the 10 qualities that men typically develop to become more confident and assertive with age, according to psychological research:
10. They make decisions swiftly and with confidence.
Focusing on solutions rather than problems allows them to avoid ‘analysis paralysis,’ where excessive deliberation prevents action. They steer clear of overthinking or fearing mistakes.
Dr. Sutton highlights the importance of decisiveness in assertiveness: It promotes the ability to make strong decisions quickly and confidently.
To be frank:
Men tend to adopt practices that boost their self-esteem.
Few things enhance ego and confidence more than making bold decisions, demonstrating their leadership abilities to themselves and others.
9. They tackle problems with a solution-focused approach.
As men age, they tend to focus more on finding practical solutions rather than dwelling on problems.
Dr. Tiffany Millaci, a contributor to Positive Psychology and an educator, notes that assertiveness helps individuals articulate important ideas and relevant viewpoints, especially in difficult situations. How does this relate to increased confidence and assertiveness in men?
By emphasizing actionable steps over negative aspects, they maintain a positive and proactive attitude.
This mindset not only enhances their confidence but also earns them respect, particularly when they back up their ideas with concrete actions.
8. They establish and uphold boundaries.
Boundaries act as protections for our personal resources, preventing us from overextending ourselves. Both men and women tend to understand this more as they age.
It is common to see people, especially as they get older, becoming skilled at clearly communicating their limits—what they find acceptable and what they don’t.
Having experienced excessive workloads and stress, it’s only natural for them to avoid burnout and pursue a balanced lifestyle. Dr. Sutton points out that setting boundaries also enhances how we manage our interpersonal relationships.
For older men, in particular, setting firm boundaries is a way to communicate their personal limits to others, ensuring they are acknowledged and respected.
7. They use confident body language.
As men age, they tend to display more confident and assertive body language.
This includes maintaining eye contact, standing upright, and using appropriate facial expressions.
Think about the men in your circle of friends, family, or colleagues whom you’ve known since their youth.
Most likely, they have outgrown their once shy teenage selves, haven’t they? This transformation didn’t happen by chance.
Their life experiences have taught them the power of confident body language, which is as impactful as verbal communication.
Psychologist Dr. Jeremy Sutton supports this view, stating that “appearing confident makes others perceive you as self-assured and assertive, even before you say a word.”
6. They handle stress efficiently.
As men mature, they not only become skilled at regulating their emotions but also at adopting more effective stress-relief methods.
Just like effective emotional management, proficient stress management offers significant benefits:
It allows them to stay calm and assertive in challenging situations. Research supports this concept:
Psychiatrists have found that individuals who regularly practice stress management techniques tend to excel professionally, which significantly boosts their self-confidence.
5. They have strong emotional management skills.
They have become adept at assertive communication, which includes better control over their emotional responses.
This means they have developed the ability to handle difficult emotions by taking a moment to reflect rather than reacting impulsively.
Such self-management helps them handle stress and conflict without resorting to outbursts or blaming others.
Ratson’s confirmation suggests that effective emotional regulation is a key component of assertiveness. Therefore, assertiveness is not about imposing one’s desires or undermining others but about expressing one’s emotions and thoughts in a way that maintains peace and productivity.
4. They communicate effectively.
Expressing your desires effectively requires strong communication skills, which men tend to improve as they age.
They master the art of assertive communication.
Psychology expert Dr. Elizabeth Scott describes assertive communication as expressing your needs and feelings directly, without offending others. With age and wisdom, many men enhance their ability to choose the right timing and tone, making their communication more engaging and assertive.
3. They possess high self-esteem.
As men age, they often focus on acquiring new skills or expanding their existing knowledge.
This might involve taking up a new sport, starting a woodworking project, or enjoying gardening.
These activities are not signs of boredom.
Instead, they reflect a deeper search for meaning and achievement as men grow older, which strengthens their self-confidence and decisiveness. Studies show that continuous learning provides individuals with fresh perspectives and enhances their ability to express their needs and desires more effectively, which is crucial for assertive behavior.
2. They have a clear understanding of their strengths and weaknesses.
Mature men don’t just pay attention to their surroundings; they also continue to learn more about themselves. As they age, men become better at understanding their own strengths and weaknesses. This self-awareness helps them become more confident and assertive.
Psychologists note that people who lack assertiveness often go along with others to avoid conflict, ignoring their own desires. However, men who improve their understanding of their strengths and areas for improvement do the opposite. As a result, they feel more self-assured and communicate their needs more clearly.
1. They dedicate themselves to continuous learning and personal development.
As men age, they often focus on acquiring new skills or enhancing their existing knowledge.
This might involve taking up a new sport, starting a woodworking project, or enjoying gardening. These activities are not signs of boredom.
Instead, they reflect a deeper search for meaning and accomplishment as men grow older, which boosts their self-confidence and decisiveness. In fact, studies show that continuous learning provides individuals with new perspectives and the ability to express their wants and needs more effectively, which is crucial for assertive behavior.